Bettors, Pay Attention to LIL B BASEDGOD

“If the iron is blunt, and one does not sharpen the edge, he must use more strength, but wisdom helps one to succeed.” – Ecclesiastes 10:10

Sports handicappers have one objective: Predict the future. It can be done. Watch the Simpsons and you’ll see its possible. Now I don’t claim to have harnessed the ability to see the future on the level of Matt Groeing, the possible time traveler, but I am keenly aware of the supernatural. Becoming a next level handicapper depends on opening yourself up to more than looking into numbers, trends, and conditions. There’s more to picking spreads than crunching data. I’ve always preached this, but factoring in your intuition can take you to the next level.

Now that football season has concluded, we are moving on to graze in other pastures. The NFL playoffs were more than kind to us (9-2 ATS, 81.82%). But we aren’t here to dwell on past victories. Complacency is an enemy of true greatness. Its time to turn our attention to basketball and other events as well. I figured this would be a good time to revert back to my preseason NBA post. In it, I told you to take James Harden at 8 to 1 odds to win this year’s regular season MVP. Now the MVP race is far from over, but I hope you listened to me. Harden is by in large the current favorite to bring home the hardware. He’s the best player on a surging Rocket’s team that has a legitimate shot at a title. But how did I predict Harden to be in this position….

LIL B BASEDGOD’s curses are freaking real dude

Those of you that scoff at the notion of curses will be the most surprised when we find out we’re living out some simulation devised by aliens for their entertainment. Lets approach this from a rationale perspective and examine the evidence.

The curse of Kevin Durant

Before we can get started on the curse of James Harden, we have to start with what happened to KD. The curse originated with perhaps the worst choice of words in the history of twitter.

KD: “I tried to listen to Lil B and my mind wouldn’t let me do it… I can’t believe this guy is relevant.”

Oh Kevin. Why would you provoke the anger of the BASEDGOD. He isn’t a malicious entity. But he is just. And this blasphemy he can not stand for. The price of calling Lil B a wack rapper is the BASEDGOD declaring you forever incapable of winning a title.

That very year, KD and a young, but ultra talented, Thunder team fell to the Heat 4-1 in the NBA finals. Surely the Thunder would be back. They simply ran into a Heat team that was having their moment. WRONG. This is when the curse truly reared its ugly head. The Thunder traded Harden off the team, and KD and Westbrook couldn’t get healthy at the right time. The curse hit its pinnacle in the 2016 WCFs when the Thunder squandered a 3-1 series lead. There are some that believe Klay Thompson was possessed by the BASEDGOD’s spirit when he rattled off ELEVEN 3-pointers in game 6 to crush Thunder fan’s hearts near and far. Lil B offered to alleviate KD of this curse if he would play him in a game of one on one. If Kevin granted this request, he would undoubtedly be publically humiliated. So after the season concluded there was only one thing he could do…

You think KD switched teams so he could play with Steph Curry, Klay Thompson, and Draymond?? HELL NO. Lil B’s from the bay area. Berkeley, California born and raised. Playing for Lil B’s favorite team was his only hope at a title. The strategy paid off and the BASEDGOD’s curse was lifted. And you know what happened? KD won a ring, averaged over 30 points a game in the finals, and brought home the series MVP trophy.

The curse of James Harden

The story of James Harden’s curse is a story of pride. Harden began his cooking dance in 2015. Obviously, he did this knowing performing the cooking dance granted you special powers (Lil B was the original inventor of the move). Do you think it is any coincidence that Harden started popping off around the same time he started incorporating this celebration?? What people need to understand is Lil B gave Harden every opportunity to confess the dance’s true origin. All Lil B wanted was the credit he deserved. A simple recognition from Harden that he learned the dance from Lil B was all the BASEDGOD desired of him. But Harden denied it outright. He even went as far as to claim he didn’t even know who Lil B was. Oh silly James. You can’t commit such a transgression with no repercussions. You brought this on yourself.

Since the curse officially began, these are James Harden’s palyoff woes:

  • 2015 WCFs Game 5: Harden set a PLAYOFF RECORD 13 turnovers and went 2 for 11 from the field, sending his team home.
  • 2016: Rockets enter the playoffs an 8th seed and lose in the first round.
  • 2017 WC semi-finals Game 6: Harden goes 2 for 11 from the field and his team is again eliminated from the playoffs.

As I mentioned earlier, the BASEDGOD is not a malicious spirit. He has a benevolent side to him. Despite the fact that Harden never recanted of his falsehoods, Lil B decided enough was enough and lifted the curse at the conclusion of last season. Harden this year has been fantastic. Its as if a weight has been lifted off him. He’s also been joined by Chris Paul which may have been the missing piece that team needed. My 8 to 1 James Harden MVP bet is looking good right now. As soon as I saw the curse had been lifted, I knew who my MVP candidate would be. Take this advice from me: Pay attention to Lil B BASEDGOD.

 

 

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